Something More Than Love
by Wills4361
Summary: Brittana Future!Fic, set 15 years after high school.
1. Chapter 1

**I'm not continuing with my other stories besides 'Extra shot at love', they were rushed and done when I had writer's block. This story is gonna be my new one when the other one is finished, it's been planned out properly and the first 5 chapters written. Just posting it now to get an interest. Hope you enjoy **

**Own nothing of Glee.**

Santana Lopez sat at her desk and sighed. It was half past four on a Friday afternoon and she had a lot of other things to do that were a damn sight better than sitting about waiting for her boss to finish his meeting so she could finally get herself home.

She looked outside her office window at the busy streets, the heavy sky line and the bustle of people moving everywhere and couldn't help but smile.

She had done it, after all the years of waiting and planning she had finally done it and gotten the hell out of Lima, Ohio. So at times like this when the last place she wants to be is at work, she remembers that at least she is sat in an office on Wall Street and not in 'Sheets and things' showing people where the towels are located.

The thought of even returning to that place makes an uneasy feeling form in her stomach. She presumed her parents were still there, not that she had spoken to them since she could really remember. When they found out about her _alternative_ lifestyle they had pretty much packed her suitcase for her.

She rubbed her eyes beneath her reading glasses and tried not to look at the clock for the hundredth time that hour. She found herself subconsciously tapping on the dark mahogany furniture of her desk, a habit she finds hellishly infuriating yet completely compulsive. Whenever thoughts of that place pop in to her mind she is filled with a lot of haunting memories and broken promises.

The familiar feeling of her throat closing and heart rate increasing as she thought back to what had been. All that had happened. The memories she had forced herself to never relive, the pain and heartbreak that had almost ruined her still managed to seep and stain in to her mind no matter how much time went on.

She is pulled out of her thoughts by a vibration in her pocket.

_Wifey 16:34 – If you're not home by 6 then Chester is having your dinner and Lily is going to play dress up in all your expensive work suits x_

Santana laughs and immediately feels herself relax. She finds herself subconsciously looking up from her phone to the photo frame that's on her desk. 15 years ago if anyone had told her she would be married to someone she met in McKinley with a beautiful baby daughter who had the exact same blonde locks as her _other _mother she would of laughed and probably proceeded to slushie them.

But the world works in its funny ways and the picture shows her and her wife now both 32 years old holding their 5 year old baby girl with a smile Santana didn't even know she possessed. The world works in mysterious ways but it also works in amazing ones too. She has a wife of 8 years and a cat for Christ sakes, what can't be amazing about that.

A knocking on her office door pulls her out of her daydream and she is then faced with a sight she doesn't appreciate. Her pompous, overly greased boss bursts in with a half way between distain and lechery. It probably serves her right for choosing a career in a work place that is so male dominated. But banks pay big and she is more than ready to handle it.

"Well, well Santana good news, it seems like you'll be taking a little trip next week. One of our main clients wants you to go and meet with them face to face" He says with a smug grin. Naturally being the only woman in the office meant she got given the trips that no one wanted to go on, she'd probably end up in a cow town in the middle of nowhere, just great.

She plasters on her best bitch smile and puts on her happy work voice "That sounds great David, where will I be going?"

"Haven't got all the details sorted yet, they are gonna tell me where and when they want you" His grin grew and Santana felt herself tightening her fist with the urge to punch the man. If he didn't pay her so much money he wouldn't even be standing right about now.

"Perfect, well just let me know as soon as you know" She stretched her smile across her face, almost uncomfortably so, trying to hold in her sneer.

"Brilliant Santana knew you wouldn't have a problem with this, always such a giver" He finished with a wink. Santana tried to keep her face composed all the while planning different instruments she could use to saw his dick off.

"Great David, I'll just be getting off then" She said quickly, grabbing her briefcase and throwing the stuff she needed for the weekend in quickly.

"Have a nice weekend then, oh and say hi to that nice little blonde thing you have waiting for you at home" He gave another wink and shut her office door. Santana could not be held responsible for the two fingers that were thrusted his way after his exit.

Santana sighed as she hit the sidewalk on the way to the subway station. She loved her job but at times it was hard. The constant sucking up to clients and bosses definitely took her toll, but the broker pay wage definitely made it worth it. She had a family to look after and at the end of the day that was all that mattered.

Thinking about what was at home waiting for her when she returned always made it easier. She would never have thought herself to be a real family person, especially after her shitty upbringing. But she could honestly say that there was nothing she loved more than her little girl. The moment she was born and she held her for the first time; it was like nothing she had ever known.

She looked nothing like Santana, taking on completely her wife's features completely after Santana had flat out refused to ever get pregnant. She had a fair point she was bad enough without 9 months of pregnancy hormones coursing through her, she doubted anyone in her immediate vicinity would have made it out alive.

But her daughter was all Santana through and through. On her 3rd birthday party when someone had given her a present she didn't like she simply replied with 'no me gusta' and Santana was sure she had never been more proud of anything in her life. She had a little carbon copy that never failed to make her day brighter.

Her phone started to ring again but rather than the name she hoped it would be it rang with something that she dreaded. Dwarf.

"What's up Man-hands?" Santana scoffed in to the phone.

"Santana need I remind you that as your client you have a certain level of professionalism to maintain at all times when talking to me" Rachel's voice hadn't gotten any less grating in the slightest over the years.

"Berry I've known you since you were 15 and drooling all over Finn, any type of professionalism went out the window after I doused you with slushie for the umpteenth time" Santana wore a sly grin at the memory.

"Well Santana as you are now my broker I expect you to at least have the decency to call me by my actual name and not by some crude interpretation of my height, nose or any other body part" Santana shook her head as she listened, seriously whoever taught her to speak like that.

"Okay, okay it's 5 O'clock on a Friday afternoon I can't be bothered to argue. So Gizmo what can I do for you?" Santana tried poorly to stop her sniggering but she couldn't help it, something about pressing Rachel's buttons gave her unrivalled satisfaction.

"Very funny Santana, I am just glad that your financial skills surpass your comedic ones otherwise I predict that my economic state would be in severe disparity" Rachel rambled on and on much to Santana's displeasure.

"Seriously Ewok, it's Friday afternoon can you at least try and talk like a normal person for once in your life" Santana scowled as she almost stumbled down the stairs of the subway station.

"Nothing wrong with a good vocabulary Santana, you should be encouraging Lily with hers. How is my Goddaughter anyway?" Santana could hear Rachel's grin down the phone.

Rachel Berry was her child's Godmother and she never let her forget it. Since Rachel was the only one of her former friends that also resided in New York, she and her wife had formed an unbreakable friendship that meant Rachel 'simply had to be' Lily's Godmother. Santana was dubious of that fact to say the least.

"She fine Berry, wonderful in fact, still drawing out plans of your untimely death so yeah it's all very encouraging" Santana chuckled down the phone. However it was far from the truth, as it seemed that the only trait Lily hadn't adopted from Santana was her immense dislike for Rachel, she loved the woman.

"Oh hush we all know she is my prodigy in the making. Me and her spent the whole of last weekend performing Broadway songs for your other half while you were working. Now that was encouraging"

"Brilliant, you are turning my daughter in to a gay man just what a mother always want to hear" Santana sighed "Look Berry I am about to get on my train so if I cut out it's definitely intentional"

"That's fine Santana I was just going to inform you that I will be attending your residence for dinner tomorrow night and no amount of sexual favours, bribes or tears will change that. It's been sorted" Santana could picture Rachel's face as she groaned at the thought of spending a whole evening of her perfectly free and relaxing weekend in her presence.

"Perfect, why don't you just kill me now it'll be less painful?" Santana grumbled.

She cut off the phone before she had to endure anymore of Rachel's voice. A ten minute conversation once a week was more than enough for her.

It took over an hour for Santana to get eventually home. By the time she had made it out of Manhattan and was on a bus towards the suburbs she was practically tearing her hair out. She would quite happily live in the city, but her wife's demands for a house and garden with a swing set for Lily had eventually won out and they had moved when she had become pregnant.

She got off the bus and walked the remaining 5 minutes as fast as she could. Looking at her watch she saw it was already 10 past 6 and she was just praying that the cat hadn't already had access to her dinner. She rounded the corner of her road and saw Lily with her arms folded over her chest, foot tapping impatiently unimpressed look firmly plastered on her face. Santana couldn't help but laugh, it was like looking in a mirror sometimes.

She made her way towards the gate and opened it. Her daughter still hadn't moved from her spot in the front garden.

"You're late" Lily said with a slight growl that made it come out with a slightly lisp.

"I'm sorry sweetheart, your stupid gnome of a Godmother called me and caused me to miss my train home" Santana lied, it wasn't strictly the truth but getting Rachel in her daughter's bad books made it worth it.

"Mommy's not very happy, you better get inside before she gives Chester all your dinner" Lily's stone faced glare slipped, the corners of her mouth turning up. Santana knew she had been forgiven.

"Well let's go and see shall we" Santana said switching the arm her briefcase was in picking her daughter up and placing her on her hip "And if the cat has eaten my dinner I'm just gonna have to cook the cat and eat that instead."

Lily's eyes went comically wide "Nooo! Mom you can't do that! Wait I know let me down" Lily scrambled off her and ran towards the gate again. Santana smiled as she saw her pulling out all the flowers that she could reach and pulling out her hairband and wrapping it round her stems so it made a small bouquet. Her blonde hair fell loose around her shoulders and bright eyes stared back at Santana triumphantly as she proudly presented the flowers to her Mom.

"Give these to Mommy, she always tells Rachy how she can never be mad at you when you surprise her with flowers" Lily said with a sneaky grin as she pressed the flowers in to Santana's hand with the briefcase and jumped up to be picked up again.

Santana hauled her up again and placed a kiss on her forehead "This is why you are my favourite kiddo, you're the Robin to my Batman"

Lily gave a disapproving look that stopped Santana in her tracks "Don't be silly Mom, if anything I'm Batman and your Robin, otherwise you'd have found a way to come back in time for dinner by now afores Mommy gives Chester all your food"

Santana chucked, the adorable phrasing easily falling off her daughter's tongue. "Good point, you're way too smart to be so young. Fine Batman you go upstairs to your bat cave while I see if I can get some food around here" Santana set a smiling Lily down once they had stepped through the door who scrambled off upstairs towards her bedroom.

"Don't count on it" Santana heard from inside the kitchen.

She sheepishly walked in to the kitchen where she saw light eyes staring back at her with a face that had matched Lily's.

"You're late"

Santana put on her best puppy dog eyes look and waved the flowers out in front of her.

"You're also getting our child to provide you with bribes for me" Santana was relieved as she saw the slight smile on her wife's face.

The met in the middle in the kitchen, the annoyance of her being late home always was overcome with the relief of being back home together. Gentle kisses and sighs being traded.

"I'm sorry honey, work was busy, gnome called and the commute was a nightmare" Santana whispered in to pale skin.

"It's okay, I know how hard you work. Anyway I called Rachel and she's coming over for dinner tomorrow night so that's totally enough punishment for being late home two nights this week" Santana couldn't help but smile.

"I know she rang me, brilliant just what I need a night with the original troll doll" Santana dodged the flick her wife gave her.

"Oh shush, we both know you love her really. Anyway enough talking about Rachel I saved dinner for the both of us and I want to find out all about your day" Santana followed in to the dining room where dinner had been set up nicely with candles and a freshly poured glass of wine.

"What did I do to deserve this hey?" Santana grinned as she wrapped her arms around her blonde's waist from behind and placed gentle kisses on her skin.

"Yeah well I love you too much to give the cat your dinner and plus you on an empty stomach means I get no action tonight and as a kept wife I have needs" Santana laughed as she sat down, never letting go of the hand held in hers.

Santana's smile softened as she sat down in the contentment of her life. It hadn't been what she had planned and it never would have been what she had pictured. But things were good and she was happy at the end of the day what more could she ask for than that. It was times like this when she forgot all about the small hole permanently left in her chest.

Picking up her wine glass she stared back at the loving smile in front of her.

"I love you too Quinn"

**Thank you for reading **


	2. Chapter 2

**Haha, I love how little morals everyone has, most reviews consisted off cute family but break them up for Brittana! Hope you enjoy and thank you for all the reviews,**

**Own nothing of Glee**

_15 Years ago _

_Santana had been staring at the white envelopes in her hand for the past 20 minutes. She hadn't been able to bring herself to open them. This is what she had spent the whole year working so hard for. This is what all the late nights, endless hours in the library and the $34 dollars an hour tutor had been for. _

_She could feel the tension in the air. She had thought about this moment many times in her life growing up. The famous moment when a child gets their college letters and they find out where they are going to be spending the next few years of their life. In the films it's portrayed as scene of nervous whisperings only to be followed by pure elation or sympathetic commiserations of a family's love. However now Santana finds herself alone sat at the desk in her bedroom with no one else in the house._

_She doubts that her parents are even aware of what places she applied for. It was the same way it had always been; too busy to have anything to do with her but merely thrust money in her direction and tell her to get on with it. After she had told them about her 'life choices' there was even more silence and even more money. She was being bribed to silently slip out of their lives, they were paying for a daughter they had never planned and a child they were ashamed of to be gone. The slight hit in their bank accounts were more than worth it._

_The slight knocking and scraping against her window pulled her attention away from the envelope for the first time since she had sat down. She heard her window being pulled open and a long pale limb slide from underneath the curtain. _

_It never failed to amaze her how graceful at just about everything Brittany was. The girl could make sneaking up on to a roof and through a window look like the epitome of elegance. It was just one of the many reasons why she loved her so much. _

_The blonde eventually manoeuvred her way in to the bedroom and Santana was met with a beaming smile that never failed to make her breath catch in her throat. _

"_Sanny they came" Brittany smiled nervously, gesturing at the letters held in Santana's hand, fully aware how much it meant for both of them._

"_It did Britt Britt" Santana returned her nervous smile, the papers twitching in her hand._

"_Have you opened them yet?" Brittany came closer and inspected the letters as if staring at it intently would help her to see what they said._

_Santana shook her head, swallowing back the lump in her throat. Brittany sensed how nervous her girlfriend was and pushed Santana's hands away from the desk and settled down on her lap, nuzzling in to her neck, gently pressing her lips against warm skin. _

"_No matter what happens just know I will always love you" Brittany breathed out._

_Santana could hear the shake in her voice. It was a rare moment of understanding that few people bar Santana, ever saw out of Brittany. _

"_I love you too B, we're forever okay baby no matter what" Santana said with a reassuring tone that was more for herself than her girlfriend. This situation had been the unspoken fear the whole year. It's easy to fall in love in high school; it's what happens after that's so much harder. _

"_Open this one first" Brittany picked one of the envelopes that had 'Ohio State' stamped on the top corner. _

_This was Santana's first choice, the one she had been dreading. Brittany had decided not to apply to college. She didn't see the point and neither did Santana. The girl loved to dance and being cooped up in a classroom would do nothing but make her sad. Brittany had decided to work for a couple of years save up some money to try and get some professional dance training and make it as a dancer. She had already gotten a job in an office full time to try and save some money. This meant she would be staying in Ohio indefinitely, something that meant Santana automatically would be planning on doing too. _

_If Santana was honest with herself staying in Ohio would not have been her first choice. She had always dreamed of going to New York. Ever since they went there for Nationals with the Glee club she had wanted to be nowhere else. But no place would ever compare to wherever Brittany was and that's why all she now wanted was to stay in this god awful state with the woman she couldn't love anymore._

_She nervously peeled back the paper, feeling the stick of the glue coming undone, it matched her own self. She had never considered herself a particularly religious person but found herself praying with all of her toes crossed, wishing for nothing more than for those first few sentences to include the words 'we are pleased to inform you'. _

_Santana hesitated as she pulled out the paper inside, her heart was hammering and she wasn't sure if she would be able to open the letter without throwing up. She felt the familiar warm press of lips against the base of her ear; Brittany still snuggled up tightly against her, her long arms wrapped tightly around her. Santana knew Brittany was feeling the nerves just as much as she was. _

_With a deep breath she folded the letter open and nervously scanned the opening paragraph. She couldn't stop the enormous grin that spread across her face as she took in the words she was so desperate to see._

_Brittany hadn't even bothered looking at the letter just waiting to see what expression broke out upon her girlfriend's face. _

"_Sanny what does it say?" Brittany asked, the slight smile on her lips as she guessed what the huge grin on her girlfriend's face would mean._

_Santana turned to face her and squeezed her even tighter before continuing to read._

"_Dear Miss Lopez, we are pleased to inform you that you have been successful in your application to Ohio State Univeri-"_

_Santana was cut off as Brittany's lips came in contact with her own. The kiss was long and passionate and neither could wipe the smile off their face as a mix of teeth and lips pressed together._

"_You did it baby you got in" Santana had never felt so special in her life at the look of complete adoration on the blonde's face._

"_We get to be together baby, we get to be together forever now" Santana felt the tears start to spill at the huge amount of relief she felt. She was going to stay close to Brittany that was all the family she would ever need. _

_They celebrated with a series of long and short kisses with intense hugs and wandering hands being just as frequent. Suddenly Brittany stood up and reached over the desk to grab the other envelope. _

"_You still have to open this one" She handed Santana over the envelope that had NYU printed on it._

_Santana's eyes flicked up before shaking her head. Truthfully she didn't want to know whether she had gotten in or not, she wasn't sure what answer would hurt more. Her dreams had always been to leave Ohio but then when Brittany had decided she was staying all her dreams had changed. The blonde was her number one priority, nothing else mattered._

"_Britt was does it matter? I got in to Ohio I don't care about NYU I'm not gonna accept it" Santana tried to kiss her girlfriend again and forget all about the words that were written inside the letter. _

_Brittany didn't waver and just pushed the letter further in to Santana's hand. The brunette sighed and reluctantly began to tear at the paper. Brittany maintained her focus on her girlfriend's face as she watched her read. Unlike last time Brittany had no idea what the letter had said. Santana's face was stoic and her mouth pressed in to a firm line. For the first time ever Brittany really couldn't read her._

_Santana finally raised her head to look at her, a smile that didn't reach her eyes gracing her features. "Yeah I got in Britt, but like I said it doesn't matter I know where I wanna be"_

_Brittany looked at her pensively for a moment. "Santana, why aren't you going to New York?"_

_Santana looked at her incredulously for a moment, unsure of what she was getting at. "Because I don't care whatever place accepted me they would never be as good as the place that you were"_

_Brittany let out a long breath and walked over to the bed and sat down, hands twitching nervously. _

"_So if I said I don't want you to go to college and I want to go to Lapland and live in an igloo?" Brittany asked._

"_I'd look in to buying us the best sleeping bag man can make so we would be warm when we snuggle at night" Santana replied in a heartbeat, completely unsure where Brittany was going with this. _

"_And what if I change my mind and say I want to go to Chicago watch the leaves blow around or San Francisco to ride on the trams?" Brittany asked again a slight croak in her voice._

"_Then I will transfer to wherever you wanna go B" Santana sighed out, getting slightly frustrated "Britt I will go wherever you will go, I just wanna be around you I don't care where I go to school or whether I even stay in school all I know is that I need you. Hell I'm even staying in shitty Ohio because I just can't function without you, I love you too much" _

_Brittany looked down sadly for a moment, the hands behind her back scrunching up the sheets out of Santana's view. She took a deep breath before plastering on a smile on her face and lifting her head back up to look at her girlfriend._

"_I love you too, now come on baby let's go to Stix and celebrate" Brittany smiled and felt the painful constriction upon her chest as she saw the pure adoration in her girlfriends face. _

_1 month later_

"_Yo Preggo! Watch where your fat ass is wobbling" Santana scowled as she carried a crate of beer in to Puck's front room having to squeeze past Quinn who was talking to Rachel. Their relationship had slowly gotten better but insults were the closest thing that either of them were ever going to get to say an I miss you._

"_Oh how I will miss your charming words when I am in New York" Quinn quipped back, a slight glint in her eye. _

_Santana sent her a slightly sad smile "You're going to NYU?"_

"_Yeah" Quinn beamed "Got the letter over a month ago, if you ever decided to actually have a real conversation with me one day you would know. What about you where are you going?"_

"_Ohio state, Britt is staying here so there is no where I would rather be in the world" Santana said with a smile. Years ago the mere mention of her and Brittany's relationship in public would have her sticking her tongue down the nearest jock's throat. It was nice how things have changed. _

_She ignored the slight disapproving look Quinn sent her, it was one she had gotten used to people seeing after telling them that she was staying in Ohio just for Brittany. 'Fuck them' she thought as she proceeded to crack one of the beers open and downed half its content._

"_Where is my girl anyway Q, she text and said she'd already arrived?" Santana asked and Quinn merely shrugged._

_Santana sat around talking to classmates that she was never going to have to see again and wasn't particularly sad about that fact. She had texted Brittany but had had no reply and was growing impatient; she wanted to see her girl._

"_While this Streisand talk is thrilling I am gonna go find B" Santana excused herself from the chat Tina and Rachel and a few others were heavily involved in and made her way through the crowded room and up the stairs._

_She had inspected a few bedrooms in Puck's relatively large house, avoiding his for the fear of what she would find inside there. She eventually made her way back down stairs still without the slight hint of where her girlfriend could be. She opened up the back doors and made her way in to the garden which was occupied by only a few couples getting drunkenly frisky. _

_As soon as she closed the door behind her she heard the unmistakable giggle of her girlfriend. Santana frowned and made her way round the side of the house to where the garage was. She was sure Brittany had gotten lost and found some poor ex-cheerio to keep her amused by explaining to them the greatness of ducks or how unicorns are the world's great secret. _

_She was smiling getting closer to where she was sure her girlfriend was when she heard the unmistakable sound of panting and moaning. A sound she had heard thousands of times before but only ever when she had been present. Her heart began to race as she found herself now running to where the sounds were coming from. She found herself praying again only this time that she was wrong and she had made a mistake, finding instead some drunken girl and her boyfriend getting it on. _

_She rounded the corner and almost crashed to the floor with what she saw. _

_Her girlfriend was sat on top of some random football player who was laid on his back on the dirty garage floor. Her dress had been pushed up to her waist and Santana could see her underwear had been tossed to the side. The boy beneath her had his jeans and boxers down by his ankles and was thrusting roughly inside of her. _

_Santana stood there for a moment, completely frozen in disbelief. She felt numb and just wanted to wake up from whatever nightmare she was in. _

_Brittany threw her head back and eyes met with Santana's. Santana was met with eyes full of guilt and sadness but oddly there was no surprise in her girlfriend's face. Her expression then changed and a smirk was thrown Santana's way._

"_S get over here come join us" Brittany breathed out with a slight laugh, still thrusting against the body beneath her._

_It was then Santana saw red. She launched herself at Brittany knocking her off of the boy under her. She then turned round and swung her fist in to the boy's face. The unmistakable crack of his nose breaking beneath her balled up hand had his scrambling out of the garage, blood pouring out of his nose, swearing profusely at her._

_Santana could feel her heartbeat in her ears as she turned round to see Brittany sliding her underwear back on refusing to meet her gaze._

"_What the fuck B" Santana heard her voice crack as the numbness subsided and the pain washed through her body. The tears unceremoniously started to fall down her face._

_Brittany refused to look at her, instead heading straight back in to the garden to re-join the party._

"_No! You don't get to do this to me and leave. Brittany I love you I fucking love you how could you do this to me" Santana grabbed at Brittany's hand and then fell to her knees, her body betraying her anger by wrapping her arms around Brittany's waist, crying in to her thigh. _

_Brittany still didn't say anything, Santana looked up to see tears streaming, her face matching Santana's._

"_Why B, why? We were gonna spend our lives together what did I do? Why would you do this to me?" Santana was hyperventilating now, unable to control the heartbreak she was feeling. _

_She felt Brittany slide down and wrap her arms around her. Santana wanted to be able to push her off, tell her she hated her, but she couldn't. The fear of the fact that she might have lost the love of her life had her gripping to Brittany with everything she had. _

"_Santana I-I…I just can't do this anymore okay. It's not you it's me, we just want different things. I'm not ready to settle down yet…" Brittany explained weakly, the look of anguish in her eyes betraying her words._

"_It's not you it's me, seriously Brittany what film did you steal that from" Santana cried, anger welling up pushing Brittany away from her. "How long have you felt like this, why didn't you tell me we could have talked about it, sorted it out"_

"_I don't wanna talk about it Santana, it's always you talking me listening, I've had enough of it. I just wanna do my own thing" Brittany voice was shaking and she couldn't bring herself to look at Santana._

_Santana froze, the fear paralysing her anger once again. "Please Britt, I'm sorry just don't leave me, just stay and we can do whatever you want okay, we can go to the park and talk about it and just please" Santana was begging now and she couldn't even begin to feel embarrassed for how she was behaving. She was desperate, just desperate for Brittany. _

_Brittany was breathing as hard as Santana, her voice breaking and she had to stop herself from running outside to be sick. She had to do this. _

"_Santana don't. I don't want to be with you anymore" Brittany managed to croak out, unable to look at what she was doing to the girl in front of her. _

"_Brittany I don't believe you, I know you love me, I know you want to be with me please" Santana was back on her knees, begging with all she had, she couldn't lose the one person she had ever truly loved. _

_Brittany steeled herself. She had known how Santana would react and she had prepared for this moment. She sucked a deep breath and met Santana's desperate stare._

"_There is someone else Santana. Me and that boy before, we got talking about a month ago and we met up and we just sparked. I wanted to tell you I just didn't want to hurt you okay? I knew you'd react like this so that's why I didn't" Brittany stated stoically. _

_Santana fell forward on to her hands at the words. She felt herself heave but nothing came out. She couldn't believe what she was hearing, how the past 5 minutes had devastated her life. _

"_Tell me it hadn't happened before" Santana breathed out._

_She could hear the hesitation in Brittany as she scuffed her heel against the floor. "I slept with him last week when you were out of town with your parents"_

_The words hit Santana square in the chest. While she was out of town with her fuck ups of parents, who were guilt buying her everything she would need for college, Brittany, her girlfriend, was getting fucked by some random. Santana was sure if she had the option to die there and then she would have chosen it. _

_She saw Brittany's feet move towards her and she knelt down in front of her. She was met with her former girlfriend, her former everything who looked in a state worse than she herself thought she looked. Brittany's normally bright blue eyes were dull and pained with grief, her make up ruined and her whole body trembling. _

"_Go to New York Santana, we need to start our own lives" Brittany sobbed out. She leant forward and pressed her lips to Santana's. It hadn't been part of her plan but she couldn't deny herself giving Santana a proper goodbye._

_It took everything Brittany had to stand up and leave, pretending to ignore the heartbroken calls of her name behind her. She passed Quinn who was staring wide eyed at her, taking in her appearance. _

"_Look after her Q" Brittany wept as she ran out of the house._

_3 weeks later_

_Santana tried not to scowl too hard as she was asked to stepped aside to be frisked. It was like nothing could go right in her life at all. She eventually walked through security to be met with a smiling blonde._

"_Cheer up, they say only the nicest looking people get felt up at airports" Quinn smiled, trying to lighten up the mood. _

"_That explains why that 300 pound fat guy was also getting frisked too then Q" Santana stated dryly, walking through departures to wait at the gate._

_They sat down and waited in silence for a long while. Quinn was awkward and unaware what to say. It had been that way since the night Brittany had left. No one had heard from or seen the blonde. Santana had been barely alive. She had kept to the confines of her empty house and it had taken all the convincing Quinn had to get her to reply to NYU and tell them she had accepted her place there. _

"_Have you heard from her?" Quinn barely heard the whisper leave Santana's mouth. _

"_No" She shook her head "No one has". It was the answer Quinn gave every time the Latina asked which had gradually become less and less as the weeks wore on. _

_Santana nodded her head as their flight was called. "Come on then, let's get the hell out of this shit hole"_

Present day

Santana jumped up abruptly in bed. Sweat was pouring down her face and neck and she could hear her heartbeat thundering. It had been years since she had this dream. The same dream that had had her without a decent night's sleep for longer than she would care to admit. The flash of blonde turning around the corner, to be gone, out of sight forever. Her heartbroken calls getting louder and louder but no one there to answer her. Curled on the cold, damp floor silently crying as she broke apart.

Santana reached over to turn the lamp on, trying to control her breathing as she calmed herself down and settle in to the warm bed in the safety of her bedroom. She looked to her left to see hazel eyes staring back at her.

"Another bad dream?" Quinn asked sadly. She had been used to these throughout college, most nights of their first year were spent holding Santana as she sobbed in to darkness. Even when they had become an item the dreams became less frequent but hadn't stopped.

It was only after they had had Lily that the dreams had finally subsided. Santana couldn't stop herself from shaking as the memories that she had tried so hard to bury all these years were so easily resurfaced.

"No, I just had a dream I was late for work. Have a big meeting today" Santana lied, a fake smile on her lips as she stroked her arm down Quinn's side.

Quinn looked at her uneasily. She knew when her wife was lying and the calls of Brittany's name in to the darkness had her knowing she was for sure.

"Okay" Quinn said quickly, burying her worries in to the back of her mind as she cuddled closer to Santana's sticky body. Santana rubbed her back for several minutes until she heard the shallow breathing settle. She stared up at the ceiling and allowed her eyes to stay fixed open. There was no way she was going to be able to sleep after that.

**Thanks for reading**


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